My Life So Far...

   I'm a 15 year old girl and o far my life was okay . I mean 50/50 . I just feel super lonely sometimes and  I end up talking to myself in front of a mirror especially at night . I'm super shy at school and I never let anyone get close to me it's like I've built a wall that surrounds me from the crowd . I'm typing this because I really am too bored with my life . I'm listening to Imagine Dragon's song called Demons . It is the only song I can ever relate to right now . It's been repeated for 30 times . Well , I used to love reading books but after PMR I just completely lost my interest in books . I bought a lot of books from Scholastic and it's going to be a huge waste now . My mom told me to talk to my cousin but she's not replying my Facebook messages , I don't know why . I just need someone to talk to and my mom was right I am extremely lonely . I always pretend that I was a celebrity that was undergoing an interview . I'll be the host and the celebrity . I do it when nobody's home cause they would think I'm weird for doing such things . Funny thing is I never cared what people think about me and I'm judging myself right now . I live my life by my own principe . I don't know whether anyone will ever read this but if you do I hope you didn't waste your time ow me . I don't own fancy gadgets like my other 'friends' . I own a slide phone and I've been using it since 3 years ago . It's an okay phone for me though . I don't think it's worth taking a pic of your food and posting it to the net before eating it . I really don't understand why do most people do that . It just don't make sense and captioning it with stupid words like "Amazing smell" . How can I even smell it ?? Okay that was a rant but I just can't stand this anymore . Anyway at school my life ends . I can't make friends at all . It's like they don't want me there but they don't say it instead they put on plastic masks and pretend they're happy . I've been to the same school since 7 and I don't think I can handle another 2 years of my life . I'm thinking please don't let December end . I don't want to go to school . I hide this from my parents and pretend I'm happy . I just don't want them to know that I'm sad deep down . They deserve to be happy after what they've been through . I think this is all for now . I hope I'll type soon . See you soon..... I hope.